I am 37 and single, no kids and minimal attachment to anything. I am your proverbial bachelor. Now I have heard the 
whispers…”Oh at 37 and not married he must either be damaged goods, a jerk, gay, or all the above. Well, I really don’t consider myself damaged goods other than having my heart-broken once or twice and I pride myself in being “the nice guy”. And I am certainly not gay!
The saying is “nice guys finish last” but I like to say in this case “nice guys just take their time.” I am not a someone who hangs out like a bar fly at sleazy dark bars in dodgy areas of the city looking for a meaningless relationship. Nor do wear a sign around my neck professing my need for a woman. But I am just like every other red-blooded man out there with a decent heart and of decent character…looking for that certain missing piece of life’s mysterious puzzle.
So where do you meet women? Do you just dial-up Soulmates-R-Us on the phone and make a request for all the characteristics you find appealing and have that special order person arrive at your doorstep? I am laughing because I actually know of a man who has a mail order bride of 7 years now. Who would have thought, 7 years!? Seriously, where do real guys meet real girls?
If you are single like I am, man or woman, I am sure you have friends and family who like to intervene in your social life and like to make suggestions on how to meet that special someone. When you are in your teens and early twenties the places to meet people are exponential. Being young provides endless opportunities to meet someone at a club, study session, bar, class, intern program, or through other friends. But as you grow into an adult and responsibilities increase the endless opportunity begins to wither and you left with just a handful of places to meet your potential significant other.
So you take your 30-something self to church every Sunday and sit in the same pew like you 
do every Sunday. You feel comfortable sitting next to the blue haired lady on your right meanwhile keeping an eye on the pretty brunette in the third row. But is church going to be a potential place to find a woman? Sure she will likely be wholesome and likely perfect to bring home to mom but is it all a façade? Is she one of those girls who looks all sweet and innocent on the outside but is a freak on the inside? Or maybe she is ultra-conservative and will scoff at your bachelor ways? Is she expecting someone wholesome or even more wholesome than she is? Not to mention the religious aspects that enter the equation just because that is the common denominator between the two of you. But then again…a good girl is a good thing. Church can be a great place if you are up for the small hurdles that may come along with the situation. This is a flip of the coin?
As the economy takes a nose dive along with many careers young adults as well as older adults are finding themselves back in school. No it’s not the days of frat parties and keg stands but it is a valid way to spend quality time once a week with someone you are fond of, right? The upside to meeting someone in class is you can really bond with someone over time and there is zero obligation however the downside to meeting someone in class is likely they are a busy person and the last place she wants to be hit on is during her time of education. Be careful and don’t look like the class jerk. This could be a good place if you play your cards right and have some patience. Is the pretty professor single?
If you are lucky to have a job you find yourself walking through the doors of the same place every weekday earning a paycheck and more than likely there is a cute receptionist at the front desk that greets 
you or maybe its the new associate that was just hired that caught your eye. Sure, an office romance is easy. Spending 40 hours a week with possible lunches during the day and dinners at night can quickly escalate into a full-blown affair easy. But whoa buddy! Ever heard the cliché “never dip your pen in company ink”? Well there is a reason someone said that…I am sure it is because the man and his pen got tossed out on the street after being accused of sexual harassment. I will admit that my ex-fiance was someone I worked with and it turned out okay for the most part but dang you walk a thin, thin line.
You get this Facebook message reminding you of your class reunion and immediately you begin to fantasize of the girl 
who got away…well actually the girl who wanted nothing to do with you but you wanted everything to do with her. So you think this is an opportunity, huh? Well this is a toss-up too. More than likely the girl you thought was super cute is not so super anymore and the girl you ignored in high school will be the one that catches your eye the most but she will be married to some successful guy and it will be her that ignores you. Or perhaps you always had an eye on a particular person but you just never had the nerve to say a thing, a single word to let her know that you liked her but now its a bit late. Yeah..,that was me.
After a long day you feel the urge to burn off some steam so you head to the gym. You got your lucky sweat band strapped around your forehead and Loverboy is playing through your Ipod when you notice a girl jump on the treadmill next to you. Immediately you suck in your gut and stick out your chest in hopes that your 12 pack of abs is reduced to something near a 8 or a 10 pack. You notice her firm body moving in perfect rhythm to “Loving Every Minute of It” which jams through your ear. But you begin to realize that you can’t hold your breath and run on the treadmill at the same time. She looks over at your as your begin to turn blue like a Smurf. The moral of this encounter is if you want to meet someone at the gym be yourself if not it could kill you!
So your ego is busted, heart is a wreck, and you have nowhere to turn other than to a bowl of Chunky Monkey. You head to the grocery store and viola! There on aisle seven is a pretty blonde picking out a jar of spaghetti sauce. You and
your bachelor basket mosey down the aisle and pretend to look over the same selection meanwhile investigating if a diamond shined off her finger. As you pretend to choose your favorite noodle you visually snoop through her groceries determining if there is a potential for a bus load of kids or some weird anti-fungal cream. Meeting someone in the grocery store is a valid way to meet someone but so much is revealed in that basket for you and for her. You can decide not only if she has kids but what her guilty pleasures are, her eating habits, is she a vegetarian? And by looking into your man basket gripped in your hand she can tell you are not so into your health with a gallon of Chunky Monkey and a six-pack of Bud waiting to be consumed.
So basically the world is your oyster as the old saying goes. Feel free to look anywhere to find that special someone who will fill your heart with complete happiness instead of pain and tears. I have tried it all and have become completely sold on the idea of chance or fate. So this nice guy chooses to finish last if that is what it takes to find that missing piece of my life. There is no need to rush or fret. Life is short, I know. But why live miserably doing so with someone you might regret. I just consider myself selective. I know what I want. Maybe its like Addison Walker said “It’s not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.”
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